Cafe Hitch-hike

2021-03-30

Step-by-step, Moment-by-moment

I made a playlist of the songs I've posted or mentioned on these pages. I tell ya, they're quite the combination! It was an amusing little list that I enjoy hearing during random errands or during housekeeping.

Huck's returning to the area this week. I'm not sure what to expect, but I have a much better sense of how I feel about him and us. If we can just be friends with bennies, I'm all right with that. I really don't think a committed thing is viable with the distance. If something manages to form between us, then great, and if not, that's the way it goes. I also didn't feel encouraged at all with the frequent disconnects these past 4 weeks.

His presence was definitely a big game changer for me. I liked that he was easy to connect with and felt rather comfortable with him. We had a variety of fun together, and I enjoyed glimpsing into his world. It was probably one of the first relationships I had in a while where I felt like an equal, like he didn't have more status, experience, or privilege than me (it's different but not unbalanced). It was the first time in a long time that someone and I (mostly) opened up to each other and... it didn't feel disastrous. It was a nice combination of things, and had a sense of attraction that I hadn't felt in an even longer time.

Timmy and Huck know about each other, except... I never told Huck that I was actually spending time with T. lately. My perception of Timmy hasn't changed (flaky, non-committal, but a friend). Huck said to do what makes me happy while we were apart. If Huck asks, I will tell him what he wants to know.

I was talking about this to my neighbor, a raunchy 88 year-old woman who slays me with her humor and moxie. She joked they may have a duel in the hallway between our units. Gees, I hope not, but it was an amusing image. Neither guy is particularly aggressive, but I wouldn't put it past Timmy to merely scope out the competition.

The neighbor also killed me when she told me Kara, the upstairs neighbor from her, used to have a lot of loud and long sex sessions. I'm friendly with the both of them but they don't like each other. Kara is always complaining about her upstairs neighbor for the same reason. K. told me about some beau she had for a long time who sounded like a loser, but based on what the neighbor said, I figured out why K. kept him as long as she had. I had to laugh... something about this building makes women randy (that, and the walls are thin).

So we finished Year One of this damn pandemic, working remotely, and the various changes that took place to everything. Our state-level political overlord permitted the vaccine to be given to people above the age of 40 and then will extend it to everyone else next week. Good luck trying to get a dose (and gee, how white of him, quibbs the angry Latina in me). I do want a dose for sure and as soon as I can.

I'm still combing through what's changed because a lot has with me, but I still don't have a full picture. Although I had a lot of stresses that everyone else has had, a lot of other stresses are no longer present in my life. I'm actually the most happy I've been in a very long time. Well, maybe I'll be kicked off my little cloud in a matter of time (oh, there's always a crash for me), but let's just see.

Guys with life and health sciences backgrounds run my employer, and because of that, we are operating much more conservatively than most institutions like us. Our personnel are mostly working remotely, with strict distancing and mask rules in place for the people who are present. As a result, we've had very little spread there. The institution is also working on getting the vaccine for everyone through a private company. We will probably return in the fall, but we'll see what the CDC has to say about all of that (which will depend on if we get serious waves or reinfections).

Since one of our despised grand pubahs departed last month, things are actually going smoothly at work. A transition team was created consisting of division heads and other building GPs, and they were speaking in normal, if not cheerful voices at a recent all-staff meeting. I didn't hear the hesitancy or sense of walking on eggshells when that damn GP was here. Even my boss sounded relieved. In our weekly chats, I pointed out some things to make her more relieved: no one felt so fiercely loyal to the GP that they feel the need to carry the torch for them, the transition team gets on quite well with each other (and everyone understands the one stickler and can work just fine with him), and the transition team actually seemed comfortable with the transition.

I'm still concerned about my friend Carlo the German in London. The health issues are piling up: kidney, bladder, and it sounds like the tumor in his prostate grew. He will know more (hopefully) tomorrow about what next will happen. He had a lot to say the other day. He's a bit reserved with his feelings at first, but he then spoke very candidly. Yes, he's scared and worried. He feels that he's a low priority patient because his chances of long term survival are low (that, and COVID strained the hell out of England's NHS; what a crap time to have serious condition). I sat and I listened; there was very little I could say but give space (is that the proper use of the expression?).

We definitely agreed that absolutely nothing can prepare a person fully for something like this, but to simply take things step-by-step, moment-to-moment. I even shared some of the wisdom he shared with me over the years because what he said did apply to what he now faced. I always liked Carlo's perspective, wit, and dry and clever humor. But, we also talk about other things. He's never met Marley the mini-dachshund, but adores their interactions on our chats (that little diva-dog likes video conferencing and knows how to put on a show, I kid you not). We'll always enjoy a drink: sometimes it's coffee for me, or sometimes it's alcohol.

Well, my hopes are with him and that he has the guidance and support he needs nearby. And, it's all making me think so differently about this 23 year-long friendship.

downwind | upstream