Cafe Hitch-hike

2021-07-01

Reunions followed by netherworlds

We had another family reunion of sorts last week. Uncle Rainman, my mother's eldest brother, and all 4 of his kids went to Wisconsin to celebrate his granddaughter's graduation from high school. It was the first time they came together. My cousin Fawn told me it was a little awkward. To give an example, R. regifted one of Fawn's Mexican panchos to the granddaughter and she didn't know how to take it. R. and Fawn wanted to share the spirit of San Diego, their favorite place. Rainman and Uncle Joe used to surf there, and although Fawn didn't surf, she loved the lifestyle, music, and mindset. They were taken aback that the granddaughter didn't take it like they hoped, but at least they were together. It was also the first time the family had gotten together like that, so maybe the granddaughter didn't have a point of reference for it.

That's one weird thing: I've seen friends for the first time in years and we click like yesterday was the last time we interacted. When it comes to families, it's almost like strangers. They don't remember things about each other or everything is almost back to square one. I guess the best way to approach family who haven't seen each other in ages is to be present in the moment, and to not draw much from the past.

Uncle Rainman's other daughter is the cousin who reached out to me a couple months ago with questions about our family lineage. She had been estranged from Rainman for a long time and was ambivalent about getting back in touch. I said very little except to go at her own pace and that, yeah, I totally know where she's coming from thanks to my own experience.

This is one of the effect of the pandemic. Now that we have more freedom of movement and a somewhat lower risk of infection, we're reaching out to one another, kind of like what happened with my immediate family these past 2 years.

I met with the boss after returning home, and it sounds like the workplace is slowed down immensely. Everyone's fried from the last 15 months and went into hiding if they could. We still don't know what's going to happen in the fall. Otherwise, the boss told me I could pretty much chill out until mid-August, when we all have to go back to the building.

A sense of lethargy returned to me when I returned to work. I should embrace the slowdown, but I'm nervous about how clumsy it will feel when we get back into business. The usual go-like-hell pace might come back, especially since we will be short-staffed.

I'm still gnawing on the idea of taking a working vacation in Texas. It looks like I'm going to be taking some training for the next few weeks anyhow, which is different than what I usually do.

I guess I feel like I'm in a bit of a netherworld with coming home. I was very glad to return to my place, but it felt different and I still can't put my finger on it. Well, I see my mentor soon. He can help me make better sense of it.

I still have the flea problem along with some neighbors with dogs. We've done the exterminator visits, and understand this is a long haul; it could take up to 2 months to get rid of the fuckers (fleas, that is).

I decided to get some new furniture for the bedroom and finally a new bed since I threw out the old one. I even decided to toss the rug I got when I moved in because the dog and I soiled it so badly, and 10 days away gave me the fresh eyes to see how badly stained it was (thanks so much, Marley-dog, grrrr...). I'll get a new rug once the f'ing fleas are truly gone (est. end of July, hah).

If the damn other job hasn't called me yet, I think I'm going to just write that off. it's been 2 months since the interview. I got one of those robo-letters from the 2 other places where I applied for jobs, and await for the last one. Well, well... the jobs and the relationship that I initiated were all busts. I guess try, try again!

Netherworld. Now, we wait to see what this Delta-variant will do to us. I don't think we're out of the woods just yet.

downwind | upstream