Cafe Hitch-hike

2022-02-22

My Tribe / Like a Colombian Party Bus

I get it. My topic is boring as fuck-all. It's like eating vegetables or adding fiber to the diet: you don't really want to, it's not pleasant to do, but it will make other things much easier once it's done. I need it to be more catchy, splashy, informal. It's nerdy, dry, and boring otherwise. In a previous entry, I bemoaned and updated the words of Ms. Hutchins, my grade 8 English teacher. While she said things like she couldn't have flashing lights like an MTV video, my version was I needed cosmetic surgery and add smoke machines, a DJ, and a stripper pole in my presentations and make it look like something on a Colombian party bus. If I could have some pisco sours and my man's lap to dance on, it would be more fun for me, too.

The events I held this month for the "National ______ Week" weren't a complete bust although turnouts were low. Even the office that assisted me with promoting the events really tried their best. I guess my off-the-meds presentation to them left an impression and they were more engaged. Or, maybe they could see my attempt to make a fiber bar more appear more tasty (hahaah). When the office first started, they had an open disdain for my division, but now they actually treat it with more regard. I can be glad for the improvements and increased support.

The lukewarm reception I get for some projects that excited me makes me think of where I've stood throughout my life: in that separate zone. I know I'm not alone in it though I was in my family, and I found people once I went off to college and met people outside of my hometown. I can embrace the wonderful and lovely people I've found over the years who are in this zone with me: the nerds, geeks, dreamers, creatives, and other misfits who probably have a touch of Asperger's or social anxiety like me. Yet we possess a streak of rebelliousness and certainty that co-exist with our outsider status. We weren't members of the Cool Kid lunch table or club. Instead, we attempted to band together, create our own and do our thing.

I once went to a gathering of one raucous club. A bearded roly-poly guy swigged beer he got from a keg in the back of a U-Haul and happily declared, "we're the people who couldn't get into sororities or fraternities in college, and we didn't care!" I still laugh about that. Maybe I should make a patch or sticker with that quote and sell them on Etsy, adding an image of a bearded guy getting beer from a rented moving truck.

I've befriended those who definitely didn't have those attributes and they've been such dear people; I guess they were open enough to think whatever it was my associates or I were doing seemed cool enough. Since I actually (and objectively) grew more attractive in my late 20s (furreal, I guess having a prominent Saturn, Capricorn's ruler helped) and also more self-assured, that also helped me find more of my tribe and friends of it.

Well-well, at least my building was excited about the events along with our few allies. It occurred to me that the building does have a sketchy reputation within our institution. Also, everyone is just trying to maintain a sense of normalcy in their areas. Maybe that's why the events didn't have a better turnout or more support. **Siiiiiiigh**

Ok, I'll saunter off and complete my National _________ Week activities, and take that surgery-induced time off that's to come to get the little break I need.

downwind | upstream