Cafe Hitch-hike

2022-10-29

What I secretly relish

I always noticed that I’d compliment someone on their name when meeting them for the first time. That usually put others at ease, especially if I mentioned it was the name of a favorite person or other.

I then had to laugh about meeting others for the first time who looked like a former beau or lover. It usually gets the same reaction inside: an inner chortle like a teenager. I’d have to bite my tongue if there was something exceptional about the person, or if a distinct memory of them often came up.

I recently saw someone who looked like Huck, who works in another building and we took an elevator at the same time. I figured he was there for a presentation which I was heading to see and briefly asked him. After that, I couldn’t look him in the face and stared at the floor numbers and digital floor display. I guess too much came to the surface that I thought was best to conceal. During the presentation, the guy looked my way and I avoided eye contact.

There was the case of a building maintenance man who looked like a masseuse who gave me happy endings a while back. They had a similar height and build, even down to the green of their eyes and their light brown hair. I suppose anyone can go on with their own associations, but I laughed at the resemblance and silently enjoyed the titillating memory.

Well, welll… The work project from hell has concluded. We (the project team) gave our final report, and part of the report was commenting on someone’s performance. As we wrote the report, people were mocking the project and that person’s performance. I sure hope not to be on the receiving end of that type of report or review.

The group acknowledged we had to be nice for political reasons and some were tempted to whitewash the not so great work of— that person. But, we decided to put a brief phrase at the end about the person’s disregard for deadlines (well, not quite like that but more objectively) and then wrote our final conclusion. It was the win the person wanted, but definitely not the victory they had in mind. We gave a politically correct final report with a hint of a backhandedness. The report now goes to some grand pubahs, and someone suggested they may see through our brief phrase. I doubt they will, but at least the group was able to say they didn’t appreciate that person’s disregard for us while at the same time, giving that person what they wanted. But, a part of me knows that person won’t be happy about the comment and won’t see their win as the slam dunk they wanted, and that’s what I secretly relish.

I guess everyone has to catch the hot potato every so often, and this awful months-long project was my version of it.

So how do I celebrate the end of that awful project? I decided to face my nemesis. The spare room/ office has become a bit of a waste site again due to the shifting around I did for kitchen renovations, guests, and my classes. That is so Virgo of me, clean a room to celebrate. I keep promising myself I’ll treat myself right really soon. Or better yet, maybe I’ll allow the guy at the pool I’ve had eyes on to treat me very right sometime soon. Anyhow, the dead laptop, papers and other debris won’t remove itself, and maybe, just maybe I’ll get close to treating myself (or being treated by someone) sometime soon.

downwind | upstream